Crave Neutrality

It’s a world of constant change, and you and I are thrown into those waves every moment of the day You are constantly challenged to perform on every level: at work, at home, in your community. Many of the demands made of you don’t feel right, or they feel like they are demanding way too much. You don’t want to give up your power in any situation, but you don’t want to be a policeman all the time either. So what do you do? Crave neutrality. What do I mean by that?
1. Don’t react in an auto-pilot way. This often means an angry reaction to what feels like an unfair infringement on your life. It’s the emotional first response.
2. Pause a few moments wherever you are. I don’t mean go into a closet or restroom. Just take a few seconds to breathe, and give yourself a little distance. Then you can respond.
3. Be non-judgmental. Don’t attach any labels of right or wrong to the other person’s behavior. This is a tricky thing to do, and may require some practice.
4. Allow your feelings to be expressed. Being non-judgmental does not means that your thoughts or feelings are bottled up; that’s not good for anyone. But it does mean a new way of expressing how you feel. For instance, instead of responding angrily to someone’s request and putting that other person down (i.e. “you’re crazy and I’m not doing that!), try something like: “I’m not comfortable with any of your requests.” Or, if you want to get really sexy, say: “I don’t feel any love coming from you with what you are saying.” That will really get them to think….haha.
5. Think differently about the demands you make on others: take a few moments to imagine how those demands will land on the other person. Are you infringing on their free will and humanity?
When implemented, these suggestions will help maintain your neutrality and peace of mind, and will also cultivate the same in those you interact with. Everybody benefits.